Yes, My Grandfather is a Jewish Republican....

The Great Schlep from The Great Schlep on Vimeo.

5 REASONS TO VOTE NO ON THE BAILOUT

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/david-sirota/top-5-reasons-to-vote-aga_b_130068.html

It's not a nipple tingler, but this article is very thoughtful, concise, and terrifying.

In Case You Missed It

I Really Don't Like Reggae

But someone at my office has a constant stream of reggae flowing from their computer - GAAAWWUUUUUUUGGGGHHHH!

When the World is Crashing

Please remember the power of puppies.

HAHAHAHAHHA

Watch CBS Videos Online

Please plug your ears during the 15 second promo - then get ready for what I'm told kids call LOLZ!

Crescent and Her BFF

First of all this is very funny. Second of all I'm mostly posting this because I know Eva is sick of Palin and this is my revenge because she (Eva) laughed hysterically at my unfortunate encounter with the sneeze guard today.

Letterman Piles On

The long version - which is hilarious, btw - is here.

She'll Kaptur Your Heart

McCain/Palin: Not A Great Week

They combine the intellectual curiosity of the Bush Administration with the poise of the Bears' 4th quarter defense. Even their supporters are going to ask why McCain can't be at the debate Friday night...

Good news:
Obama remains up in the polls in Colorado, Michigan, Wisconsin, Minnesota.

Can the Democrats find a way to fuck this up? We should have a contingency plan in place.

Even SingerYusa (tm) must admit this is grody

Celebrity Mix Update

It may have already happened, but if not, I'm adding Richard Branson to Tim Riff's Celebrity Mix

Understatement of the century

No sh*t! In case you're not totally convinced, here's the article:

http://music.msn.com/music/article.aspx/?news=331936&GT1=28102

Might Cause Mental Illness--In A Good Way?

http://sulis.webcity.com.au/~wax49993/cpr/06_God.mp3

sorry, don't know how to make it a link.

Adeltime!

Addison & Clark-Friday, September 19, 3:42 PM



Overheard from 3 meathead passersby "Dude that is SOOO Gay"

Happy Friday

I Had A Nightmare About Sarah Palin; This Has Nothing To Do With It

Batten Down the Hatches Ye Landlubbers!

A Classic.

Tina Fey as Sarah Palin

In case you missed it...

Favor?

Feel like doing me a solid? I wrote an article for HuffPo that I also posted on Salon.com - and I want them to think people like my writing. If you have a second and are so inclined, either just give it a "thumbs up" or post an actual comment at either (or both!) places. I will owe you one. Or more.

Huffington Post

Salon

Update: look who posted it.

Rug Cutting

From List of the Day.

The shit that happens at 1:52 is truly jaw-dropping.

From the department of W-T-F:

My god, it's a miracle!

Adviser says McCain helped create the BlackBerry

By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Published: September 16, 2008

Filed at 10:38 a.m. ET

MIAMI (AP) -- Move over, Al Gore. You may lay claim to the Internet, but John McCain helped create the BlackBerry.

At least that's the contention of a top McCain policy adviser, Douglas Holtz-Eakin. Waving his BlackBerry personal digital assistant and citing McCain's work as a senator, he told reporters Tuesday, ''You're looking at the miracle that John McCain helped create.''

McCain has acknowledged that he doesn't know how to use a computer and can't send e-mail, one of the BlackBerry's prime functions."

... Holtz-Eakin, former director of the Congressional Budget Office, said McCain's service on and leadership of the Senate Commerce Committee put him at the intersection of a number of economic interests, including the telecommunications industry.

House of Palin

From OpenSalon contributor K.M. Breay:

House of Palin

The season finale of Fox's smash hit "House Of Palin" garnered a record 58 million viewers Thursday evening, becoming the most watched television show in American history. The wildly successful reality program, which chronicles the foibles and follies of Vice President Sara Palin and her whacky family, became an instant sensation when it debuted shortly after Mrs. Palin took office last year.

Last night's episode resolved several cliffhangers and closed with surprise appearances by President McCain and Lindsay Lohan. An overnight New York Times-CBS poll found that 77 percent of viewers were pleased that Bristol Palin quit her job as an Applebee’s waitress and decided to finally pursue her dream of becoming a Formula One racecar driver. Warrior, her rambunctious two-year old son, will make the move to North Carolina with his mother. But his father Levi will continue to live in the Naval Observatory basement. Bristol and her husband have not been on speaking terms since he was caught selling the Vice-President’s undergarments on Ebay.

The poll also found that Track Palin’s approval rating plummeted from 70 to 6 percent overnight. Viewers were outraged that the brooding Iraq War veteran, in a fit of rage, killed a neighbor’s barking dog with a surface to air missile, producing a dangerous, half-acre blaze that took the fire department over 24 hours to extinguish. Police officers arrived at the Naval Observatory to arrest Mr. Palin, but President McCain, citing the Country First Act, immediately exonerated Track and ordered DC police to leave the premises. As the police were leaving, Mr. Palin stood bare-chested in the driveway, raised a middle finger and shouted, “suck this” while clutching his genitals.

Willow Palin embarked on a solo-hunting trip in Alaska, where the 14-year-old continued to impress viewers with her grit and resourcefulness. In a dramatic, tense moment, Ms. Palin climbed an snowy embankment and came face to face with a 700 pound buffalo. When the beast approached, Ms. Palin let out a high-pitched warrior shriek and charged the buffalo, driving a knife made of stone deep into its chest. She then devoured the animal raw, reducing it to bones in less than five minutes.

Vice President Sara Palin has moved her approval rating amongst women from an already stratospheric 88 percent to an unprecedented 100 percent with her decision to file for divorce from her husband Todd. The Sara-Todd saga has captivated and divided viewers ever since Mr. Palin announced his plans to undergo a sex change operation and change his name to Destiny.

After the shocking news, the Vice President fell into a deep depression and spent nearly every day in bed, watching Passion of the Christ, eating moose paws and receiving pedicures from a rotation of secret service agents. In the months leading up to the operation, Destiny started wearing Jordache jeans, purple glitter and sassy half-shirts. He enrolled in beauty school part-time, but continued to discharge his duties as Second Gentleman. The Vice President felt conflicted over the decision to leave Destiny, struggling between her religion’s opposition to both divorce and sex change operations. But public opinion turned sharply against Destiny when he/she started openly dating the troubled actress Lindsay Lohan.

President McCain made a dramatic appearance last night when he and Vice President Palin boarded Air Force One and flew to Los Angeles, where they confronted Destiny and Ms. Lohan at the House of Blues on the Sunset Strip. With the rapper Snoop Dogg performing onstage and Ms. Palin trailing behind, the President strode purposefully through the crowd and into the VIP section, where Destiny and Ms. Lohan were ensconced in private booth, tongue kissing behind a wall of champagne. The President stormed up to Destiny and knocked all the champagne bottles from the table, while Ms. Palin stood behind him with her arms crossed. Then the President reached into his breast pocket and retrieved a thick packet of divorce papers. Snoop Dogg stopped rapping and the whole crowd turned and looked on in stunned silence. Once President McCain had everyone’s full attention, he slammed the divorce papers down on the table and said, “You’ve been served!” Vice President Palin kissed her index finger, touched her backside and made a “sizzling” sound. The crowd roared, cheering and shouting insults at Destiny and Ms. Lohan.

The ground-breaking finale closed with Snoop Dogg, President McCain and Vice President Palin performing several rap songs from Mr. Dogg’s platinum-selling album “Doggystyle.”

As Requested

Not sure if you were kidding Shecky, but here it is:

Balakov's Classics In Lego /

Too Soon?

Infinite Jest?

Then Ortho Stice had entered the hot waiting room, shirt wet and crew cut matted from the courts and toting his Wilsons, and made right for the AC-vent's downdraft outside Travis' little vestibule. Stice's clothes were comped by Fila and when he played any sort of match he wore all black, and at E.T.A. and on the tour was known as The Darkness. He had a crew cut and the beginnings of jowls. He and Hal exchanged the very slight sorts of nods people use when they like each other past all need for politeness. They had similar games, although most of Stice's touch was at the net. Stice rasied one hand to his eyes and cocked his head slightly in the direction of the office's lamplight.

Furthermore, I'm dead.

A day late...but still so amazing.

http://www.aprilwinchell.com/2008/09/11/the-mother-of-all-911-posts/

One more vid of Shanghai Shecky's special lady.

I might be the only person who thinks this is funny....but I really really do.

http://www.236.com/video/2008/gabe_and_maxs_cocktail_party_t_8810.php

Dude!

The audience at the Toronto Film Festival press screening of "Slumdog Millionaire" didn't know they were also going to get live entertainment Saturday.

There'd been lots of Oscar buzz about Danny ("Trainspotting") Boyle's flick, about a poor Mumbai guy who wins a girl and becomes a national hero by going on a game show. So the screening room was packed.

Soon after the lights went down, a source tells us, "a man in the audience started yelling, 'Don't touch me!' People looked around and shrugged. Ten minutes later, the voice yells again, 'I said don't touch me!'"

Again, people shrugged off the disturbance. But a few minutes later, says our source, "the guy stands up in the darkness and thwacks the guy behind him with a big festival binder. He hit him so hard everybody could hear it. Everyone freaked out and turned around."

The thwacker? New York Post film critic Lou Lumenick.

The thwackee? Esteemed Chicago Sun-Times film critic Roger Ebert.

After battling thyroid and salivary gland cancer for years, Ebert, 66, can no longer speak.

"Apparently, Roger was just trying to tap Lumenick on the shoulder to signal him that he couldn't see the movie," surmises our source. "He was trying to ask him to move over a bit."

Though Lumenick seemed surprised to see whom he had struck, he offered no apology, according to another source.

Lumenick didn't return a call and e-mail by deadline. Ebert's agent declined to comment.

Lumenick's lashing didn't prevent Ebert from enjoying the film. The critic walked out of the screening with two thumbs up — and handed Boyle a note saying he's bound to get an Oscar nod.

WWJBD?

What Would Jason Bourne Do?

He would just get like three guns and a snowmobile and just.... Blam! Blam! Blam!

Election '08: It's All About ME

http://www.buffalonews.com/home/story/436250.html

America: At Least We're Consistent

A gallery of bad 9/11 art. I live for this shit.

Nerds Gone Wild!

The Large Hadron Collider opens at CERN tomorrow. This enormous particle accelerator will be looking for the elusive Higgs-boson particle, which from what I understand (not much) is the key to proving the existence of dark matter and explaining a lot of what we only sorta know about the universe.

And they got crazy fresh rhymes, yo!

Happy Friday!

Got A Case of The Mondays?

Perhaps this video of National Velvet dropping some science on an ear of corn will cheer you up!





Scene stealing by Russell J. Singer.

Uke Scholastica Highlights

It was the best show yet!


The Facts of Life from david singer on Vimeo.

Ghostpost

Sent in by a source wishing to remain anonymous:

My Dear Friends,

As many of you know, based on our candid discussions (and, at times, heated debates) over the course of the past several months, my first choice for President fell short in her historic quest for the Democratic nomination.

It was a contentious primary campaign.

As a result, I-- like millions of other voters-- needed to take time to ensure that my eventual choice for President fully represented my views on the important issues of the day. Although it was inconceivable that I would ever consider voting for anyone other than the Democratic nominee, I nonetheless felt an obligation to learn everything I could about the candidates who would appear on the ballot in November.

For the first time in my adult life, I found myself seriously weighing the nominees and comparing their positions on the key issues that face America during this time of war, environmental peril and economic hardship.

As of today, I am pleased to share with you my choice for President.

I believe that his words, rather than anything I could say, speak volumes about the kind of Change that he will bring to America. I trust, after viewing these clips and hearing his inspiring call to action, that you will share my enthusiasm....

Fact, fiction, and little white lies

ST. PAUL, Minn. – Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and her Republican supporters held back little Wednesday as they issued dismissive attacks on Barack Obama and flattering praise on her credentials to be vice president. In some cases, the reproach and the praise stretched the truth.
Some examples:

PALIN: "I have protected the taxpayers by vetoing wasteful spending ... and championed reform to end the abuses of earmark spending by Congress. I told the Congress 'thanks but no thanks' for that Bridge to Nowhere."

THE FACTS: As mayor of Wasilla, Palin hired a lobbyist and traveled to Washington annually to support earmarks for the town totaling $27 million. In her two years as governor, Alaska has requested nearly $750 million in special federal spending, by far the largest per-capita request in the nation. While Palin notes she rejected plans to build a $398 million bridge from Ketchikan to an island with 50 residents and an airport, that opposition came only after the plan was ridiculed nationally as a "bridge to nowhere."

PALIN: "There is much to like and admire about our opponent. But listening to him speak, it's easy to forget that this is a man who has authored two memoirs but not a single major law or reform — not even in the state senate."

THE FACTS: Compared to McCain and his two decades in the Senate, Obama does have a more meager record. But he has worked with Republicans to pass legislation that expanded efforts to intercept illegal shipments of weapons of mass destruction and to help destroy conventional weapons stockpiles. The legislation became law last year. To demean that accomplishment would be to also demean the work of Republican Sen. Richard Lugar of Indiana, a respected foreign policy voice in the Senate. In Illinois, he was the leader on two big, contentious measures in Illinois: studying racial profiling by police and requiring recordings of interrogations in potential death penalty cases. He also successfully co-sponsored major ethics reform legislation.

PALIN: "The Democratic nominee for president supports plans to raise income taxes, raise payroll taxes, raise investment income taxes, raise the death tax, raise business taxes, and increase the tax burden on the American people by hundreds of billions of dollars."

THE FACTS: The Tax Policy Center, a think tank run jointly by the Brookings Institution and the Urban Institute, concluded that Obama's plan would increase after-tax income for middle-income taxpayers by about 5 percent by 2012, or nearly $2,200 annually. McCain's plan, which cuts taxes across all income levels, would raise after tax-income for middle-income taxpayers by 3 percent, the center concluded. Obama would provide $80 billion in tax breaks, mainly for poor workers and the elderly, including tripling the Earned Income Tax Credit for minimum-wage workers and higher credits for larger families. He also would raise income taxes, capital gains and dividend taxes on the wealthiest. He would raise payroll taxes on taxpayers with incomes above $250,000, and he would raise corporate taxes. Small businesses that make more than $250,000 a year would see taxes rise.

MCCAIN: "She's been governor of our largest state, in charge of 20 percent of America's energy supply ... She's responsible for 20 percent of the nation's energy supply. I'm entertained by the comparison and I hope we can keep making that comparison that running a political campaign is somehow comparable to being the executive of the largest state in America," he said in an interview with ABC News' Charles Gibson.

THE FACTS: McCain's phrasing exaggerates both claims. Palin is governor of a state that ranks second nationally in crude oil production, but she's no more "responsible" for that resource than President Bush was when he was governor of Texas, another oil-producing state. In fact, her primary power is the ability to tax oil, which she did in concert with the Alaska Legislature. And where Alaska is the largest state in America, McCain could as easily have called it the 47th largest state — by population.

MCCAIN: "She's the commander of the Alaska National Guard. ... She has been in charge, and she has had national security as one of her primary responsibilities," he said on ABC.

THE FACTS: While governors are in charge of their state guard units, that authority ends whenever those units are called to actual military service. When guard units are deployed to Iraq or Afghanistan, for example, they assume those duties under "federal status," which means they report to the Defense Department, not their governors. Alaska's national guard units have a total of about 4,200 personnel, among the smallest of state guard organizations.

FORMER ARKANSAS GOV. MIKE HUCKABEE: Palin "got more votes running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska than Joe Biden got running for president of the United States."

THE FACTS: A whopper. Palin got 616 votes in the 1996 mayor's election, and got 909 in her 1999 re-election race, for a total of 1,525. Biden dropped out of the race after the Iowa caucuses, but he still got 76,165 votes in 23 states and the District of Columbia where he was on the ballot during the 2008 presidential primaries.

FORMER MASSACHUSETTS GOV. MITT ROMNEY: "We need change, all right — change from a liberal Washington to a conservative Washington! We have a prescription for every American who wants change in Washington — throw out the big-government liberals, and elect John McCain and Sarah Palin."

THE FACTS: A Back-to-the-Future moment. George W. Bush, a conservative Republican, has been president for nearly eight years. And until last year, Republicans controlled Congress. Only since January 2007 have Democrats have been in charge of the House and Senate.

The Burdens of Marriage, in Three Acts

Act I




Click here for Act II
Click here for Act III

VP Audio Celebrity Mix

Sarah Palin Sounds 100% like Owen Wilson when she speaks

I found her speech a major cause for concern, anyone else?

The new poster boy for safe sex

Look at the McCain death grip!

America's Top......Muppet!?

LOS ANGELES, California (AP) -- The Muppets could come back to primetime
television with their own reality show.

After plunking down a whopping $90 million last year for rights to Kermit and cohorts, Disney is hoping to relaunch the Muppets on a prime-time ABC series parodying such unscripted hits as American Idol and America's Next Top Model.
ABC has ordered a script andfive episode outlines for "America's Next Muppet," in which viewers may join inchoosing the newest member of the puppet family that includes Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy, a network spokeswoman said Tuesday.