Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Monday, November 24, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Eva and I have often wondered why Bruce Campbell never "made it" as a leading man - he's funny, handsome, charismatic...
Perhaps this recent quote of his illustrates part of the problem:
''All right, you think you're all so smart?'' said Campbell. Then he challenged [the audience] to play studio exec as he pitched one of his past projects. ''I'm Frank Marshall,'' he began. ''I've produced all of Steven Spielberg's movies. Interested? Okay, I've got a book written by Michael Crichton. I'm going to get John Patrick Shanley, the Academy Award-winning writer of Moonstruck, to adapt it. It'll be shot by Allen Daviau, who did E.T. Will you make this movie? Well, congratulations! You just made Congo.''
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
From Miles Raymer's blog at the Reader:
"Brokencyde is quite possibly the worst band in the world. I literally can't find a single thing about these guys that anyone could find appealing. Actually I can't find a single thing about them that doesn't make me want to send them to jail for the rest of their lives. Combining the most misogynist elements of hip-hop with the most misogynist elements of emo is just one of their crimes--there's no calculating the damage they've done to the very concept of music.
I just went to their MySpace and discovered that they have 46 pages of photos of scene girls in various states of undress with "Brokencyde" Sharpied on their bodies. That's like discovering a pile of dead kittens two stories high, except that kittens don't usually die from their own bad judgment."
I actually think the part with the guy screaming is kind of hilarious. Maybe it's me.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Last January, I stole Paul & Liza's red lighter, and sent them the following missive:
YOU WILL NEVER SEE THIS AGAIN
To which they responded:
To which I replied:
And they concluded with:
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Pretty funny video of the new cast member doing Arianna.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
"I like Sarah Palin, and I've heartily enjoyed her arrival on the national stage. As a career classroom teacher, I can see how smart she is -- and quite frankly, I think the people who don't see it are the stupid ones, wrapped in the fuzzy mummy-gauze of their own worn-out partisan dogma. So she doesn't speak the King's English -- big whoop! There is a powerful clarity of consciousness in her eyes. She uses language with the jumps, breaks and rippling momentum of a be-bop saxophonist. I stand on what I said (as a staunch pro-choice advocate) in my last two columns -- that Palin as a pro-life wife, mother and ambitious professional represents the next big shift in feminism. Pro-life women will save feminism by expanding it, particularly into the more traditional Third World."
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
In case you missed it, this was the Reader cover the day after the election. Lake Effectors, how does it strike you? I had an angry kneejerk reaction when I first saw it-it seemed needlessly negative and cynical, especially the morning after the election.
Monday, November 10, 2008
"The Mormon church contends that the baptism offer can be rejected by the intended recipient in the afterlife."
But wait, there's more: The LDS will give you a 10% larger planet as your celestial reward, should you in any way be unsatisfied with your undesired, postmortem souljacking. GUARANTEED!
Convert now, proxies are waiting, salvation not guaranteed, disallowed by law in all sane nations and states.
President-Elect Obama and his team are drawing up plans under which terrorism suspects at Gitmo would either be released, shipped to the U.S. for criminal trials, or face trial at a new kind of court "designed especially to handle sensitive national security cases," AP reports.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
from a tape of Obama debate prep obtained by Newsweek
Obama continues: "When you have to be cheerful all the time and try to perform and act like [the tape is unclear; Obama appears to be poking fun at his opponents], I'm sure that some of it has to do with nerves or anxiety and not having done this before, I'm sure. And in my own head, you know, there's--I don't consider this to be a good format for me, which makes me more cautious. When you're going into something thinking, 'This is not my best ...' I often find myself trapped by the questions and thinking to myself, 'You know, this is a stupid question, but let me ... answer it.' Instead of being appropriately [the tape is garbled]. So when Brian Williams is asking me about what's a personal thing that you've done [that's green], and I say, you know, 'Well, I planted a bunch of trees.' And he says, 'I'm talking about personal.' What I'm thinking in my head is, 'Well, the truth is, Brian, we can't solve global warming because I f---ing changed light bulbs in my house. It's because of something collective'."
posted by Shanghai Shecky
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
First off, if you support John McCain, fine. Alternately, if you're a certifiable moron who is still undecided, there's little I can do now to remedy this condition.
However, if you are a registered Democrat and avowed supporter of Barack Obama and you yell at me and berate me when I call, saying you have received "lots" or "10" or "12" calls asking for your vote and to never call again, I do have a response:
1. Be glad your vote means something. You can get pissed at the unpaid volunteers who are hustling to get you to the polls or you can be thankful that you live in a state that grants you the power to affect the outcome of an historic election.
2. If you really think receiving a dozen phone calls is too onerous a burden for a democratic citizen to bear, you probably shouldn't be one.
3. Fuck you very much.
I also have him winning one of the electoral votes in Nebraska (they split, but you can't do it on this map) for a total of 326. You heard it here.
I also say NBC calls it at 9:41 Chicago time. Drinks after the Obama speech anyone?
Some of you may recall hearing about the night I spent getting sloshed on free apple martinis at Jay Z's club as a Nation intern "covering" the 2004 Republican National Convention in NYC. Really my friend Carmina, another intern, and I used our press passes to get into one of the only RNC parties we could-- one hosted by a Republican African-American politician from Maryland whose name I, predictably, cannot recall. Carmina, in between dancing to Crazy, went around the dance floor asking a lot of people, "You're black-- why are you a Republican?" To which they tended to respond, "I'm not really."
Yesterday my mother and I went to the nearest of three downtown Obama phone bank centers. There were the velvet ropes. Instead of bouncers there were two smiling, bearded guys wearing flannel, one with a ski vest, but there was no mistaking. After signing in so that the campaign could "tell Jay Z and Beyonce how many people showed up" to the space they had "generously donated," my mom and I split up (She got the billiards room upstairs.), and I made my calls from one of ten white leather couches (accidentally across from a girl I went to college with). In another room some guys watched the Jets game, and every half hour or so a server with a plate full of wings stepped awkwardly over us, as he tried to make his way to a paying table.
How's that for full circle?